The story of Dilandau's Thong
by Lilith2
Summary: what more do i need to say? just a little something i thought up when i was bored out of my mind...R&R plz!!!!!!!!


Disclaimer: no I don't own Escaflowne...however…Dilandau's thong is mine!  
  
Note: okay this is YAOI. Mainly between Gumiel and Dallet. If you're offended by this kind of stuff then don't read this story! So don't say I didn't warn you! This was kinda of an after-studying-post-final-stress-relief comedy. If that makes any sense at all. So I promise you, it will be odd. R&R plz!!!!!!!  
  
The story of Dilandau's thong   
  
The sound of swords scabbing could be heard echoing down the hallway outside of Dilandau's throne room.  
Every morning, Dilandau would pick two new dragonslayers to go into a violent sword fight for his own enjoyment. This was his way of training them, plus it temporarily satisfied his bloodlust.   
Gumiel and Dallet were two of his greatest fighters, and this morning both of them were giving it all they had.   
Gumiel gritted his teeth and charged at his opponent, only to have Dallet block with his sword and slash at him so strongly he almost lost his footing. Dallet took advantage of this weakness and came at him just a bit to quickly, and took Gumiel down with him.   
For a moment the two bodies just lay their on top of each other, both boys starring at each other. Then their eyes moved to the dragonslayers, who stood watching contently. Then to Dilandau, who didn't seem angered or excited at the moment. He sat there, with his hand resting on the tip of his chin. In the darkness it was hard to tell if he was even awake.   
After a long moment he said strongly, "continue."  
With a heavy sigh Dallet climbed off of Gumiel, and a wave of relief sweep thought the dragonslayers.   
Gumiel staggered to get up, but the before he could, dale brought his sword up to meet Gumiel's neck.  
"I win," Dallet said sweetly, and Gumiel gritted his teeth.  
"Well done," Dilandau said, and the dragonslayers gave a small applause. And with that the dragonslayers and Dilandau marched out to the dinning hall for dinner.  
Dallet took his time, and slowly put his sword back in his belt. Being the last person still in the room, he slowly made his way to the doorway.   
But before he could make it there another body grabbed him by his shoulders and slammed him against the wall.  
"Do you really think that was a fair fight?" Gumiel asked, his face hidden by the dull light.  
"Does it really matter? Dilandau didn't say anything." Dallet answered, remaining calm.   
"Well..." Gumiel said, leaning in so Dallet could feel his breath against his cheek. "Do you know what I wanted to do back there?"  
Dallet opened his mouth to speak but before he could Gumiel kissed him deeply. Dallet returned the kiss harshly, grabbing the other boy's head and running his fingers though his hair.   
The two boys broke after a short while, both panting hardly.  
"Baaaa…" Gumiel said, preparing to kiss Dallet again.   
"Excuse me..????" a soft voice called from the door way next to them.   
Little Shesta stood there blushing deeply, "umm…guys…Dilandau told me to…find you…for dinner…but if you don't want…to eat that is, I can…leave…"  
It was hard to not notice the raising number of gay dragonslayers on the floating fortress. Shesta, being the youngest and most shy, had ha hard time dealing with girls, let alone guys. He never knew what to do in these kinds of situations. Dilandau either never noticed the gay dragonslayers, or chose to ignore them.  
Gumiel and Dallet walked up to Shesta casually, each putting an arm around his shoulder. This just cased him to blush harder.   
"No Shesta, don't leave just yet." Gumiel said.  
"You say everyone is at dinner?" Dallet asked.  
Shesta nodded, "yes everyone."  
"So no one is likely to be in…Dilandau's room are they?" Gumiel asked.  
Shesta swallowed hard. "No I guess not, can I-I-I get back to dinner?"  
"Do you have something naughty in mind?" Dallet asked, ignoring Shesta.   
Gumiel nodded, "Ever wonder what makes Dilandau's hair do that 'swa' thing?"  
"That would have to be some powerful hair gel." Dallet said, starting to think about it.  
"Image what we could do with that hair gel…or what Dilandau would do without it…" Gumiel asked, and all three boys began to contemplate.  
"Wait a minute…what if he finds us?" Shesta asked.  
"He wouldn't know it was us. And besides, you will put it back." Dallet replied.  
"I'LL put it back?????!!!!" Shesta cried.  
"Glad you agree! Let's go!" Gumiel said, and him and Dallet dragged a kicking and protesting Shesta to Dilandau's room.  
"No no no no no guys come on???? Why me??? ME??? He'll kill me!!!!" Shesta wailed.  
"Then don' get caught." Gumiel said.  
"Shhh…listen." Dallet asked when they reached Dilandau's door. They all paused. "He's in the shower."  
"Oh well! Lets go then!" Shesta cried excitedly, trying to walk away. Dallet and Gumiel pulled him back against the wall.  
"Come on Shesta! Don't be such a baby and just do this!"  
"But…he's in there!" Shesta protested.  
"He's in the shower. Be really quiet and he'll never see you." Gumiel turned Shesta to face the doorway, "And be quick about it too!" He added, slapping his butt.  
Shesta let out a small yelp, and tiptoed into the room. It was all dark but for one candle in one of the corners of the room. On the wall across from him was a huge red velvet canopy bed, on one side was a dark wood dresser, and on the other a stone fireplace.   
Shesta thought to himself and looked around to room. Now, if he had a huge powerful thing of gel, where would he hide it... his eys fell to the crowed dresser.  
It was littered with little ideas, carefully, Shesta made his way to it. There were daggers, a huge flame-thrower, many empty wine bottles, a portable mirror everything but…  
Then his eyes fell on it. It wasn't the gel, it was something better.   
It was sticking out of the dour, just hanging there like any other piece of clothing. A flame thong.   
Shesta picked it up, only to discover that it was silk and very thin, almost see through material. He clenched it in his hand, and made his way to leave.  
But then he heard the weirdest thing. The shower had stopped sometime while he was in the room, and he could swear that he heard singing coming from Dilandau's bathroom.  
Shesta couldn't help himself, he knew Dilandau would kill him if he knew he was here, but he had to see what was behind that door….  
Bright lights crept from around the barely opened door. And as Shesta come closer to it, the singing got louder. Silently, Shesta opened the door.   
"I JUST FEEL "RHYTHM EMOTION" Ayamachi mo itami mo! Azayakana Isshyun no hikarihe to Michibiite!" Dilandau sang, spilling in circles and shaking his ass in front of the million mirrors that surround him "I JUST FEEL "RHYTHM-" Dilandau complete stopped in mid movement when he saw the young Shesta starring at his naked body.  
Shesta stood still as well, this WASN'T what he had been expecting. For a moment the two guys just stayed were they were, both of them too baffled to speak.  
At last Dilandau cleared his throat and turned to completely face Shesta, hands placed on his clothes less hips. "Is there, something wrong Shesta?"  
Shesta swallowed hard, the color rising to his checks. He looked at the feet, not wanting to stare at Dilandau's balls. "No sir!"  
"Well, then, you may leave my room now." Dilandau's eyes turned to the object that was held in Shesta's hands. "Hey is that my flame thong?!"  
Shesta swallowed hard again, than made a run for it.  
"WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING WITH MY FLAME THONG?????THAT'S MY FAVORITE!!!!" Dilandau roared behind him, grabbing the flame-thrower from his dresser.  
Shesta charged though the door and slammed it behind him. Panting he pushed himself up against the wall.  
"What is it?" Gumiel asked, "did you get the gel?"  
"No…" Shesta smiled, "something better!" he held up the thong.   
"Wow! That's Dilandau's?" Dallet asked, feeling its softness.   
"Yeah, it's great huh? But there's just one little problem…" Shesta added softly.  
"What?" Gumiel asked.  
"SHESTA!!!!!!" from inside Dilandau's room the door came flying off in a mob of flames. Out emerged Dilandau, completely nude, holding a huge flame-thrower, and laughing insanity.   
"Oooh shit!!!" Cried Dallet and all three boys took off running.  
"BHAHAHAHAHA!!!YOU CAN'T RUN FROM ME!!!!!!" Dilandau cried, letting the flame-thrower spit fire before him and chasing after them.  
"Shesta what did you do???" Dallet asked, all boys still running.  
"I didn't...well…I did take his thong, but…I…umm.."  
"Shesta he was in the shower! Did he come out?" Gumiel asked.  
"Well I guess you could say that…. and I came in…and I…I…well…"  
"Shesta???!!!" Gumiel and Dallet shouted together.  
"HEHEHEHEHE!!!!YOU ARE MINE SHESTA!!!!BHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"  
The three boys speed up their running, and realized that they needed a place to hide.   
Gumiel quickly turned around a sharp corner and led Shesta and Dallet into the closest room. He slammed the door behind him, before realizing that room he had led them into.  
"Gumiel? What were you thinking?" Shesta asked, starring around at the other 12 nude boys around him.  
Dallet's eyes went wide, "oh good, my favorite time of the day, shower time…"  
The other 121 boys barely looked over. There were 15 individual showers, and behind that a locker and changing room.  
"DALLET! What in the hell are you looking at?!" Gumiel shouted stepping in front of Dallet, blocking his view.  
"What? Can't I even look?" Dallet asked innocently, still trying to get a look.  
"Shesta!" a voiced cried out of nowhere.  
"Oh boy…not now…!" Shesta muttered to himself as a shinning Miguel clothed only in a cute towel run up and lacked onto Shesta.  
"I missed you at dinner! Where were you???" Miguel asked as a blushing Shesta nervously looked around. The whole shower room was starring at him, awaiting his reply.  
"Well…I was…I was…. Well it's a funny story but I…."  
He was cut off as the door behind him came smashing down.  
As the dust cleared a figure stood in the shadows.   
"Ssssshhhhesta….."  
Shesta swallowed hard.  
Dilandau stepped into the room, and let he's flame-thrower fly. Although the boys in the shower room were happy that Dilandau was here, and nude, they weren't too pleased with his flame-thrower. All the men, clothed or not, ran for their lives out the back exit, some screaming like little girls.   
Dilandau just laughed insanely and chased after them, waving the flame-thrower wildly.  
"Shesta darling?" Miguel asked as the dragonslayers ran for their lives.  
"What is it Miguel?"  
"WHY THE FUCK IS DILANDAU CHASING WITH A FLAME-THROWER???????"  
"Well…I told you it was a funny story!" Shesta said, laughing nervously.  
The boys took a sharp turn around the corner, only to almost run to Folken.  
He had been talking a peaceful walk around the fortress, and was quite surprised to find 15 boys, most in towels, running from a very nude Dilandau with a flame-thrower.  
All the boys stopped running, as did Dilandau, and starred blankly at him.  
"Dilandau what are you doing?" Folken asked.  
"Well…it's not what it looks like…" Dilandau said, glancing at all the barely clothed dragonslayers.  
Folken sighed, this wasn't the first time something like this had happened. "Should I just back out of the room now?"  
Dilandau glanced at all the dragonslayers, who seemed to have paused in mid-motion. All together they gave a slight nod.  
"Okay," Folken said quietly, leaving the room much in the way he entered it. He could hear the screams of the dragonslayers and Dilandau's insane laughter carry on without him. He sighed, wondering if he will ever be able to understand them. It was then that they noticed the odd lumps in his dark cape. He lifted up the back end to expose three hiding dragonslayers.  
"Shesta, Gumiel and Dallet?" Folken gave a puzzled look, "what are you doing?"  
"Making a run for freedom! Save us!" Gumiel answered in a harsh whisper.   
"What did you do now?"  
"Nothing! Nothing! Where something…"Shesta replayed, blushing slightly when he remembered his deed.  
"A very little something, and soft too." Gumiel added, giggling like a schoolgirl.   
Folken rolled his eyes at the three boys. "Well, you are a safe distance from Dilandau now."  
"Thank you!" all three slayers shouted, retreating from under the cape and running off to their rooms.  
Folken shoot his head, and for a second wished he could be like them and fit it. Then he continued his nightly walk around the fortress.  
  
~ The next day ~  
  
"Line up!" Dilandau commanded, marching into the room as he did every morning. He walked past the dragonslayers, as a way of exception, just as he did every morning.   
Shesta swallowed hard as he drew nearer, oh god does he still remember? How could he not! But he seems to normal, as if everything is as it should be. Shesta thought, What will he do to me if he knows I still have it?  
Dilandau walked casually past the boys, but stopped right in front of Shesta. Not even bothering to look at him, he held out his hand. "Where is it?"  
Shesta swallowed hard again, looking at Gumiel and Dallet for advise, but they were too busy with each other to notice. "Where is what sir?"  
"You know what I'm talking about Shesta, just put it in my hand and I wouldn't have to kill you."  
"But sir I'm…"  
"Where is it?"  
"I'm wearing it sir."  
Even though Dilandau was starring straight ahead at the time, and not at Shesta, he could clearly see Dilandau's upper lip and left eye twitch.  
"Bring it to me-WASHED tomorrow or I will have your head, understand?' Dilandau ordered, his face still twisted.  
"Yes sir."  
With that they day went as on it always had.   
  
  
The end  
You like? I know, I know, it was weird. But give me a break I have a weird sense of humor. Review plz!!!!!!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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